Update (mostly) from the other side of my life

Not easy to be brief (and yes I know that's a hallmark of poor writing). Stuff it I'm not Hemmingway and never have pretended anything of the sort. This is nothing more or less than a safety valve that earns its corn when I might otherwise be tempted to slide the bread knife between the ribs or drop a hairdryer in the bath. Accidentally, of course. The rest of the month I can happily ignore him which, as it happens, I much prefer.

After the screw up of Monday afternoon, I worked yesterday afternoon in complete chaos. Bloody customers everywhere and Torex were buggering away with the software which meant we had to hand process card transactions; and that means some unlucky so and so will have to re-process those transactions today and that really is a miserable job.

Ally wasn't around, in fact there wasn't much talent at all. I'm still not sure if I've even seen the one with the backside Jo's obsessed with or the one who had chicken pox recently and who she wanted to visit and cover (all over) with calamine lotion. Ghastly stuff. I'm not even sure I'd offer to smother Scotty in extremis. Well, maybe I would.

And of course, according to some sandal-wearing bearding from one or other midlands polytechnic, I'm not supposed to think such things or write about them... which disgusts me totally. I sat here and ranted at the radio at him this morning which was pointless except that it hopefully startled the neighbours.

I've just had one of those really annoying thoughts pop into my head; some stupidly obvious truth that's escaped me for years. It comes of realising that there isn't a single bloke in this dump I would have an affair with ... I was so worried about him shagging his way through the female population, and I've been so frustrated by the time and expense he's incurred conducting this trans-Atlantic affair I failed to take proper account of the complete absence of talent of either sex... he was never going to, and he had no choice.

I just wish he'd fuck off to Philly and leave me in peace. Lazy bastard.

No doubt the weird beard thinks that its a dreadful shame that the struggle for equal pay for equal work has been reduced to a struggle for Equal Rights to Ogle and Seduce.

Anyway I much prefer the kind of red-blooded opinionatedness which I can still respect even when I don't agree. Shamefully the Australians for a Constitutional Monarchy web site is the beneficiary of careful management (and still makes me want to puke) while the John Howard pm satirical blog lies fallow after showing early promise ...

Hey ho, someone's sick and so I'll have go in to work again today, later this afternoon. Adam and Scotty will certainly be on the menu... so there's the upside.