Your caring sharing artillery manufacturer

What do you look for in an armaments producer?

Personally I look for financial ruin, but that ain't likely to happen anytime soon. I've been in a foul mood since about 1:00pm of what is now yesterday and in need of amusing.

Thanks to tomorrow's newspaper I'm now in a fabulous mood. I feel so much better for knowing that some death peddling corporation or other has been ploughing some of its ill-gotten gains into R&D into environmentally sensitive weapons of mass destruction.

Look out for a lead-free bullets which will be next slaughter season's must-have accessory; so much kinder to swans and other vulnerable birdlife. And the next generation of ballistic missiles will be far quieter as they travel overhead on their way to wrecking death and destruction somewhere or other, thereby causing far less noise pollution en route.

These days very very few stories cause me to check the date but this one did. It is right up there with my favourite April Fools news stories, but it isn't one - it should be. It is simply fabulous. I only heard the gist (at least I hope I got the gist) during a preview of the main stories in tomorrow's (now today's) papers.

Any further developments and a link to the actual story will follow in due course.